Proverbs 31: The Excellent Wife and Kingdom Wisdom
The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.
What, my son? and what, the son of my womb? and what, the son of my vows?
Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.
It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine; nor for princes strong drink:
Lest they drink, and forget the law, and pervert the judgment of any of the afflicted.
Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.
Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.
Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.
Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Proverbs 31, a fitting conclusion to the book, stands apart with its focus on two distinct yet related themes: wise counsel to a king and the portrait of an "excellent wife." This chapter follows Solomon's teachings (Proverbs 25-29) and the words of Agur (Proverbs 30), offering a powerful culmination of the wisdom found throughout Proverbs. It emphasizes virtues applicable to all, regardless of gender, and highlights the importance of godly influence, particularly that of women. This chapter is a reminder that true success and fulfillment are rooted in wisdom, diligence, and a reverent fear of the Lord.
Counsel to a King (Proverbs 31:1-9)
The chapter begins with the words of King Lemuel's mother, a testament to the profound impact a godly mother can have (Proverbs 1:8; 6:20). She offers crucial advice to her son, the king, emphasizing the responsibilities and temptations that come with leadership. Her words are not merely suggestions but vital warnings against the destructive forces of promiscuity and intoxication. A "kingdom man" doesn’t spend all his energy chasing after fleeting pleasures (Proverbs 31:3). Instead, he seeks a godly woman to cherish (Proverbs 31:10-31).
Lemuel's mother knew that a ruler indulging in these vices risked not only personal ruin but also the well-being of his kingdom. Intoxication clouds judgment (Proverbs 31:4-5), leading to injustice and the neglect of those in need. Instead, a king's focus should be on advocating for the vulnerable, "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy" (Proverbs 31:8-9). This passage underscores the importance of just leadership and compassion for the marginalized. A kingdom man serves others, not the other way around.
The Portrait of an Excellent Wife (Proverbs 31:10-31)
The second part of Proverbs 31 presents the well-known and admired portrait of an "excellent wife." This passage is not simply a list of unattainable ideals but a celebration of a woman who embodies wisdom, strength, and compassion. Finding such a woman is rare and precious (Proverbs 20:6), a treasure far more valuable than jewels (Proverbs 31:10). This woman knows how to grab heaven and apply it to earth so life becomes better for everyone under her influence.
Her character is marked by trustworthiness and diligence. "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value" (Proverbs 31:11). She is a hard worker, rising early to provide for her household (Proverbs 31:15) and engaging in profitable ventures (Proverbs 31:16). This woman is not idle (Proverbs 31:27). Rather than bored, she’s industrious. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from far away (Proverbs 31:14). She has business acumen. She spends money wisely and uses it in the best way to get maximum productivity for the benefit of her family. This is a picture of a woman who is both resourceful and responsible, managing her household with wisdom and care.
This excellent woman is also characterized by her kindness and generosity. "She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy" (Proverbs 31:20). She is not consumed by her own needs but actively seeks to help those less fortunate. She makes a difference and invests in others. When she does speak, she speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue (Proverbs 31:26). When she talks, she has something worth saying. She has the ability to use the right words at the right time as she encounters real-life situations.
Furthermore, she is prepared for the future, ensuring her family is well-clothed and cared for (Proverbs 31:21-22). She is respected in the community, and her husband is honored because of her (Proverbs 31:23). This woman prioritizes her family. God has given a woman the unique responsibility of watching over the activities of her household (Proverbs 31:27). She understands the central place that the home plays in the kingdom of God. And while the husband’s role is to be the head of the home, the wife is the chief operating officer—the internal home manager. Paul encourages women to be “workers at home” (Titus 2:5) and to “manage their households” (1 Timothy 5:14), he doesn’t mean they have to stay inside the four walls of a house twenty-four hours a day. He means that everything a woman does outside the home complements what goes on inside the home; it doesn’t compete with it.
Ultimately, her true beauty lies not in outward appearance but in her character and her fear of the Lord. "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised" (Proverbs 31:30). Time has a way of erasing beauty. What will last, though, is the inward person being renewed day by day even while the outward person is perishing (see 2 Corinthians 4:17). The secret to this lady’s modus operandi is found in her fear of the Lord. The reason she was wise, the reason she could prioritize her family, the reason she had everything in order is because she took God seriously. She had a divine worldview. God controlled her, and so her decisions were divinely authored.
Her reward is the respect and admiration of her family. "Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her" (Proverbs 31:28). This acknowledgment is a testament to the impact she has had on their lives.
Lasting Praise and Application
The chapter concludes with a call to give her the reward she has earned and to let her works speak for themselves (Proverbs 31:31). This is an encouragement to recognize and appreciate the contributions of women in our lives, not just for what they do but for who they are. Praise the godly women in your life and watch them blossom. This is the way God designed life to be lived, so let’s be wise and live accordingly.
Proverbs 31 is not limited to women alone. The qualities described—wisdom, diligence, compassion, and a fear of the Lord—are virtues to which all should aspire. This chapter serves as a reminder that true success and fulfillment are found in living a life of integrity and service, guided by God's wisdom. It challenges us to examine our own lives and strive to embody these virtues in our daily interactions and endeavors. It also serves as a reminder to appreciate and honor those who embody these qualities, recognizing the profound impact they have on our lives and communities.
The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.
What, my son? and what, the son of my womb? and what, the son of my vows?
Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.
It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine; nor for princes strong drink:
Lest they drink, and forget the law, and pervert the judgment of any of the afflicted.
Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.
Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.
Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.
Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Proverbs 31, a fitting conclusion to the book, stands apart with its focus on two distinct yet related themes: wise counsel to a king and the portrait of an "excellent wife." This chapter follows Solomon's teachings (Proverbs 25-29) and the words of Agur (Proverbs 30), offering a powerful culmination of the wisdom found throughout Proverbs. It emphasizes virtues applicable to all, regardless of gender, and highlights the importance of godly influence, particularly that of women. This chapter is a reminder that true success and fulfillment are rooted in wisdom, diligence, and a reverent fear of the Lord.
Counsel to a King (Proverbs 31:1-9)
The chapter begins with the words of King Lemuel's mother, a testament to the profound impact a godly mother can have (Proverbs 1:8; 6:20). She offers crucial advice to her son, the king, emphasizing the responsibilities and temptations that come with leadership. Her words are not merely suggestions but vital warnings against the destructive forces of promiscuity and intoxication. A "kingdom man" doesn’t spend all his energy chasing after fleeting pleasures (Proverbs 31:3). Instead, he seeks a godly woman to cherish (Proverbs 31:10-31).
Lemuel's mother knew that a ruler indulging in these vices risked not only personal ruin but also the well-being of his kingdom. Intoxication clouds judgment (Proverbs 31:4-5), leading to injustice and the neglect of those in need. Instead, a king's focus should be on advocating for the vulnerable, "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy" (Proverbs 31:8-9). This passage underscores the importance of just leadership and compassion for the marginalized. A kingdom man serves others, not the other way around.
The Portrait of an Excellent Wife (Proverbs 31:10-31)
The second part of Proverbs 31 presents the well-known and admired portrait of an "excellent wife." This passage is not simply a list of unattainable ideals but a celebration of a woman who embodies wisdom, strength, and compassion. Finding such a woman is rare and precious (Proverbs 20:6), a treasure far more valuable than jewels (Proverbs 31:10). This woman knows how to grab heaven and apply it to earth so life becomes better for everyone under her influence.
Her character is marked by trustworthiness and diligence. "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value" (Proverbs 31:11). She is a hard worker, rising early to provide for her household (Proverbs 31:15) and engaging in profitable ventures (Proverbs 31:16). This woman is not idle (Proverbs 31:27). Rather than bored, she’s industrious. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from far away (Proverbs 31:14). She has business acumen. She spends money wisely and uses it in the best way to get maximum productivity for the benefit of her family. This is a picture of a woman who is both resourceful and responsible, managing her household with wisdom and care.
This excellent woman is also characterized by her kindness and generosity. "She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy" (Proverbs 31:20). She is not consumed by her own needs but actively seeks to help those less fortunate. She makes a difference and invests in others. When she does speak, she speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue (Proverbs 31:26). When she talks, she has something worth saying. She has the ability to use the right words at the right time as she encounters real-life situations.
Furthermore, she is prepared for the future, ensuring her family is well-clothed and cared for (Proverbs 31:21-22). She is respected in the community, and her husband is honored because of her (Proverbs 31:23). This woman prioritizes her family. God has given a woman the unique responsibility of watching over the activities of her household (Proverbs 31:27). She understands the central place that the home plays in the kingdom of God. And while the husband’s role is to be the head of the home, the wife is the chief operating officer—the internal home manager. Paul encourages women to be “workers at home” (Titus 2:5) and to “manage their households” (1 Timothy 5:14), he doesn’t mean they have to stay inside the four walls of a house twenty-four hours a day. He means that everything a woman does outside the home complements what goes on inside the home; it doesn’t compete with it.
Ultimately, her true beauty lies not in outward appearance but in her character and her fear of the Lord. "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised" (Proverbs 31:30). Time has a way of erasing beauty. What will last, though, is the inward person being renewed day by day even while the outward person is perishing (see 2 Corinthians 4:17). The secret to this lady’s modus operandi is found in her fear of the Lord. The reason she was wise, the reason she could prioritize her family, the reason she had everything in order is because she took God seriously. She had a divine worldview. God controlled her, and so her decisions were divinely authored.
Her reward is the respect and admiration of her family. "Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her" (Proverbs 31:28). This acknowledgment is a testament to the impact she has had on their lives.
Lasting Praise and Application
The chapter concludes with a call to give her the reward she has earned and to let her works speak for themselves (Proverbs 31:31). This is an encouragement to recognize and appreciate the contributions of women in our lives, not just for what they do but for who they are. Praise the godly women in your life and watch them blossom. This is the way God designed life to be lived, so let’s be wise and live accordingly.
Proverbs 31 is not limited to women alone. The qualities described—wisdom, diligence, compassion, and a fear of the Lord—are virtues to which all should aspire. This chapter serves as a reminder that true success and fulfillment are found in living a life of integrity and service, guided by God's wisdom. It challenges us to examine our own lives and strive to embody these virtues in our daily interactions and endeavors. It also serves as a reminder to appreciate and honor those who embody these qualities, recognizing the profound impact they have on our lives and communities.