Song of Solomon 5: Reluctance, Romance, and Radiant Love

Song of Solomon 5 Scripture
1

I am come into my garden, my sister, my spouse: I have gathered my myrrh with my spice; I have eaten my honeycomb with my honey; I have drunk my wine with my milk: eat, O friends; drink, yea, drink abundantly, O beloved.

2

I sleep, but my heart waketh: it is the voice of my beloved that knocketh, saying, Open to me, my sister, my love, my dove, my undefiled: for my head is filled with dew, and my locks with the drops of the night.

3

I have put off my coat; how shall I put it on? I have washed my feet; how shall I defile them?

4

My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him.

5

I rose up to open to my beloved; and my hands dropped with myrrh, and my fingers with sweet smelling myrrh, upon the handles of the lock.

6

I opened to my beloved; but my beloved had withdrawn himself, and was gone: my soul failed when he spake: I sought him, but I could not find him; I called him, but he gave me no answer.

7

The watchmen that went about the city found me, they smote me, they wounded me; the keepers of the walls took away my veil from me.

8

I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, if ye find my beloved, that ye tell him, that I am sick of love.

9

What is thy beloved more than another beloved, O thou fairest among women? what is thy beloved more than another beloved, that thou dost so charge us?

10

My beloved is white and ruddy, the chiefest among ten thousand.

11

His head is as the most fine gold, his locks are bushy, and black as a raven.

12

His eyes are as the eyes of doves by the rivers of waters, washed with milk, and fitly set.

13

His cheeks are as a bed of spices, as sweet flowers: his lips like lilies, dropping sweet smelling myrrh.

14

His hands are as gold rings set with the beryl: his belly is as bright ivory overlaid with sapphires.

15

His legs are as pillars of marble, set upon sockets of fine gold: his countenance is as Lebanon, excellent as the cedars.

16

His mouth is most sweet: yea, he is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, and this is my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem.

Song of Solomon 5 Commentary
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Song of Solomon 5 delves into the complexities of marital intimacy, exploring both the joys and challenges that arise even within a passionate relationship. It beautifully portrays the push and pull of desire, the importance of tenderness, and the enduring allure of true love.

The King's Delight and Divine Approval (Song of Solomon 5:1)

Solomon's initial words paint a picture of consummated love. He refers to his bride as a "locked garden" (Song of Solomon 4:12), emphasizing her purity and virginity before their marriage. This "garden," once inaccessible, is now open to him, her husband. The bride invites him to partake in its delights (Song of Solomon 4:16), and he readily accepts. The verse is filled with sensual imagery – myrrh, spices, honey, wine, and milk – representing the exquisite pleasures he finds in her.

Interestingly, a third voice enters the scene, a narrator who seems to have access to the couple's intimate space. Many believe this to be God Himself. This voice encourages them: "Eat, friends! Drink, be intoxicated with caresses!" (Song of Solomon 5:1). This inclusion is significant. It serves as a powerful reminder that God not only permits but also celebrates the sexual intimacy between a husband and wife within the bonds of marriage.

The Song of Solomon makes it clear: the Bible is not ashamed of sex. While reserving sexual intimacy solely for marriage, it affirms that it's a beautiful and integral part of the marital relationship. God intends for married couples to experience profound joy and connection through sexual intimacy, viewing it as a precious gift.

A Rift and a Regret (Song of Solomon 5:2-8)

The narrative takes a turn, revealing that even the most passionate relationships encounter conflict. The husband arrives, longing for his wife's company (Song of Solomon 5:2), but she, for reasons unstated, resists his advances (Song of Solomon 5:3). Perhaps she is tired, preoccupied, or simply not in the mood.

Instead of reacting with anger or demanding his rights, the husband responds with tenderness. This act of gentleness stirs her feelings for him (Song of Solomon 5:4). However, by the time she is ready to reciprocate, his desire has waned (Song of Solomon 5:5-6). This highlights a crucial aspect of marriage: the ebb and flow of desire, the importance of patience and understanding.

In her regret, the wife goes out in search of him during the night, only to be mistaken for a prostitute and mistreated (Song of Solomon 5:6-7). Now, she is the one consumed by lovesickness (Song of Solomon 5:8). This section illustrates how easily misunderstandings and miscommunications can disrupt intimacy and create distance.

This episode serves as a powerful reminder of Paul's words in 1 Corinthians 13:4-5: "Love is patient, love is kind... It is not irritable, it does not keep a record of wrongs." The passions and desires of husbands and wives are not always synchronized. External factors, stress, or even minor irritations can impact our emotions and desires. It's crucial to respond with grace, empathy, and a willingness to understand our partner's perspective.

The Bride's Boast: A Portrait of Her Beloved (Song of Solomon 5:9-16)

The story shifts again. Other young women, curious about the depth of the bride's devotion, ask her what makes Solomon so special (Song of Solomon 5:9). Why is she so desperate to be reconciled with him?

The bride's response is a breathtakingly beautiful and detailed description of her husband. She extols his virtues, both physical and personal, painting a portrait of a man who is both handsome and admirable (Song of Solomon 5:10-16). Just as he delights in her physical beauty, she delights in his.

However, her admiration goes beyond mere physical attraction. She describes him as her "love," her "friend" (Song of Solomon 5:16). He is her intimate companion, a man of character and integrity – a "kingdom man," as Tony Evans puts it. This section highlights the importance of seeing our spouse not just as a lover but also as a friend, someone we respect, admire, and enjoy spending time with.

The Song of Solomon 5 reminds us that marriage is a complex and dynamic relationship. It requires intentionality, communication, and a willingness to navigate both the passionate highs and the inevitable lows. Ultimately, it is a journey of mutual delight, unwavering commitment, and a love that deepens with time.